Witchy Woman
by Risknight
Summary: There are many words Sheldon could use to describe Penny. At the moment the only one that comes to mind is 'Witch'.


**I think I've forgotten how to write short Ramblings. Regardless, welcome to Autumn, my friends. :)  
**

* * *

Penny Queen was several things. Volatile, brash, messy, loyal, and kind were just some of the words used to describe her by her tall neighbor. There were other words, too, depending on how annoyed he was with her, but the one word he had never attributed to Penny was 'witch'. Maybe that's why it took him 53 seconds to make sense of what he was seeing.

Penny stared down the demon trying to break the binding spell she had flung over him. "Tell me your name," she said with annoyance.

"Bite me!" he bellowed. He twisted his neck 180 degrees to try and see if there was a weakness in the bonds clamping his five arms tightly to his side. "Bite me twice!" he snarled when he felt her constrict the spell.

Penny sighed and flicked her hand toward his head. Immediately one of his horns became a gaudy lilac color and sprouted a pink Penny-Blossom. "I can do this all night," she warned. "Tell me your name."

The demon roared with humiliation and tried to throw himself toward her. She countered with a calmly spoken shield spell. He bumped his forehead against the invisible barrier and saw stars just like one of those stupid cartoons his minions were always watching.

"I will rip out your heart and drink your life's blood!" the demon bellowed loudly. "I will rip you limb from limb and scatter your body parts to every corner of this world! I will curse your family for 13 generations!"

Penny giggled with amusement. "Tell me your name or I'll turn your eyes blue before sending you back to hell."

The demon thrashed wildly. "You wouldn't dare, you bitch!"

Penny crossed her arms, aware of Sheldon standing at the roof entrance, but unwilling to turn her attention from the hellspawn trying to enter this realm. If he got through completely it would be a pain in the ass to send him back. She hated sacrificing virgins. They always whined so much. "Look, we can do this the hard way and you can tell me your name, or we can do this the fun way and I seal you inside a hamster and keep you as a pet," she warned. "Now, which is it?"

She held out a hand and conjured a small ball of fur from the closest pet store. She smiled at the tiny animal hopefully. "It's been a while since I last had a pet."

The demon glared at her hatefully. "You wouldn't dare! The over-demons would never allow it!"

Penny snickered and shook her head. "Remember Gorgfrem Halthbaw the Blood-drinker? My mom has no idea her parakeet used to be 9 feet tall with a scorpion tail."

Sheldon watched with amazement as the ebony colored creature turned a sickly pale blue color. It swallowed hard and looked at him pleadingly. "Mortal! I can give you fame! Power! You would be rich beyond your wildest dreams! Simply kill the witch! She is evil! Witchcraft is an abomination before your god!"

Sheldon nervously eyed the creature. "First of all, I have no god. Second, if I did believe in a supreme being, I would think a demon would be more of an abomination than a witch. Third, Penny has an alarming tendency to go junior rodeo on anyone who upsets her. I would prefer not having myself hog-tied and castrated."

The demon paled even more. "Castrated?" he gulped. "She wouldn't dare!"

Sheldon stepped up beside Penny, feeling bolder. "She made me a nice wallet from the last demon's nether region."

He could see Penny's shoulders shake slightly with mirth as the demon struggled fiercely. "Menthak Clexilian the Hungry!" the demon shouted. "I don't wanna be a wallet!"

Penny snickered under her breath before handing Sheldon the hamster. She raised her hands and her fingers seemed to dance through the air. Sheldon couldn't quite see the patterns she was making, they were too hazy for his eyes to comprehend. Her voice was low and firm as she spoken the Latin incantation to send the demon back to where he came from. There was a heavy pulse of air and a loud *POP* sound. When the smoke cleared there was a tiny scorch mark on the roof where the demon had stood.

Penny laid a hand over the hamster and it disappeared, too. She walked over to the scorch mark and pulled a pencil from her pocket. She drew a symbol over the spot and pressed her palm over it. It glowed for a second and dissolved the scorch mark.

Penny stood and put away her pencil with a satisfied smirk. "There. All sealed up." She turned and looked at him with resignation. "Sweetie, we have got to quit meeting like this. This is the fourth time you've caught me."

He looked at her warily. "What do you mean?"

Penny walked over and shook her head tiredly. "I can't keep erasing your memory, Moon Pie. It's exhausting. So, I'm going to make you a deal. I'll let you keep your memories, as long as you never tell anyone about this. Deal?"

He started to speak but froze as her words soaked into his mind. Horror and anger warred within him. "You've erased my memories?! When?!"

Penny patted his arm and walked past him to the stairwell. "Come on, Sheldon. I'll make you some tea."

Sheldon stared after her until she disappeared around a bend. He sprang forward, chasing after her. "When, Penny? When?!" Her lilting laugh floated back up the stairs to him. He was getting answers if it was the last thing he did!

* * *

Penny poured boiling water over the teabags and pushed the small jar of honey closer to Sheldon. He gave her a baleful glare and sat down at the island. "Tea will not distract me, Penny. I want answers."

Penny sat down across from him and shrugged. "Okay. Here goes. I'm a grade 6 witch. I'm one step away from a sorceress. My powers are hellfire based. My grandfather was a night-demon. They're one of the lesser demon ranks. Mostly mischief makers. Papaw was very fond of jokes and puns. I was assigned Pasadena as my base because it's a hot spot for evil. I keep the creatures you think are fairy tales in line. I also keep demons from opening portals and trying to cause trouble. The demon you saw tonight was pretty weak, but he could have done enough damage to draw the attentions of humans."

"And my memories?" he asked stiffly.

Penny sighed softly. "You've walked in on me performing magic four times. Once when I was doing a healing on a troll, once when I was conjuring a dragon egg, once when I was casting out a poltergeist and once when I was battling a demon." She sipped her tea and looked at him worriedly. "You were hurt that time. You and the guys were playing paintball and you got chased into the woods. You stumbled upon me and a water demon fighting near the reservoir. She managed to drag you between us and tried to steal your life force. I had to merge our souls to keep you from dying."

As she spoke Sheldon's mind filled with the memories of that day. He remembered the pain, the panic and the fear he had felt. He remembered the way Penny had fought fiercely. Most of all he remembered the tears and anguish in her eyes when she had thought him dead. How could he have forgotten that? "What does it mean to merge souls?" he asked weakly.

Penny bit her bottom lip. "I drew your soul into me and wrapped my soul around it to keep you from dying. Basically, I shared my soul's essence with your soul."

Sheldon thought about that carefully. The battle had taken place four months ago. That was also the same time period that he had noticed a shift in his perception of Penny. He had realized he became annoyed far less often. He had also begun to seek out her company on occasion. It was also when he had begun to feel a great deal more aggravated with Leonard's constant moaning about how much he and Penny still belonged together.

Penny nodded, drawing him out of his memory. "It forged a connection between us. We are more comfortable with each other now." She drew in a deep breath. "That's why I am going to offer you a deal. I don't want to erase your memories again. It feels like I'm violating you. But if you want to retain them, you have to agree to some conditions."

He wanted to berate her for tampering with his mind. How did she know she wasn't doing him harm? However, he could remember now the fear and pain he felt. He remembered the demon and it's deadly grip. Maybe she had erased his memories for his own protection. Of course, now his curiosity was aroused. "What kind of conditions?"

Penny nibbled on her bottom lip nervously. "I would have to fully bind us. We would be twined. Basically, I would weave a spell that would unite you and I into a pair. My magic would recognize you as my… um, companion. You would keep your memories and there would be no secrets between us."

He eyed her suspiciously. "What would the benefit be to me, besides retaining my memories? Which you had no right to take, by the way!"

"You would never be alone," she said softly. "Twining would bind me to you. I will always be your friend. I will never abandon you. Whenever you needed me, I would be there. By twining us, my magic would automatically protect you from harm, even if I wasn't there in person. A piece of my magic will reside in you."

He perked up a bit and she shook her head. "You're a Void, sweetie. You don't have even the tiniest magical ability. You won't be able to perform magic. It will act on it's own to ensure your safety."

"And the benefit to you?"

Penny's expression was solemn as she reached out and cupped his left cheek. "I would always know you were safe."

Sheldon swallowed the lump in his throat. Before he could respond Penny released him and the moment was gone. "Also, I could never lie to you," she said calmly. "You would know automatically if I tried. We would feel the urge to comfort and take care for one another."

Penny finished her tea and stood to take her cup to the sink. "There are other benefits for you, Moon Pie. When I die, by Magical Law, you would inherit everything I own. According to our traditions you would be entitled to my belongings, both physical and mystical."

"Mystical?" he repeated. "What does that mean exactly?"

Penny smiled and snapped her fingers. Sheldon squawked and jumped to his feet as the orchid beside him suddenly looked up and grinned, showing wickedly sharp teeth. Behind Penny a shimmering, opaque shape came into view. The little shape waved at him happily. A very stunned Sheldon slowly waved back.

"Moon Pie, meet my, for lack of a better word, familiars. That's Jax in the pot and Finn is the ghost. Jax is actually a sprite. She was cursed a couple hundred years ago. I inherited her from my Nana. She's a great guardian. No one can sneak up on you with her around. Finn has lived here for 47 years. He fell off his bike on the sidewalk and broke his neck. He's a bit shy."

Sheldon looked back and forth between the ghost, the plant and Penny. A twitch started in his right hand and slowly moved up his arm, across his chest and down his entire left side. Within seconds he was having a full blown panic attack.

Penny sighed and walked around the island. Sheldon flinched as she took his hand in his. She looked at him sadly. "I understand," she murmured tenderly. She leaned in closer and blew a breath across his face.

* * *

Sheldon smiled slightly as he looked up from his flip and fold to greet Penny. For about five months now he had been experiencing a shift in his perception of his comely neighbor. He supposed he was becoming accustomed to her, because he found himself seeking her out fairly often. Either she was less annoying, or he was more tolerant. Whichever it was, he had grown to enjoy her company. The only fly in the ointment, as his Meemaw would say, was his roommate's obsession with reforming a carnal relationship with Penny.

"Hey, sweetie," Penny smiled as she filled a washing machine with her dirty clothes. "How was your day?"

"My day was productive," he said calmly. "I have made great strides in my work, Leslie Winkle was reprimanded for unprofessional behavior, Kripke had the mumps and Leonard is away for the week at a family reunion. How are you?"

Penny smiled widely at him. "Same old, same old. You're all alone tonight? I was thinking of ordering some pizza and watching season one of Sherlock. Want to join me?"

Sheldon agreed quickly. "That would be acceptable."

"Cool," Penny said, heading to the door. "I'll go order the pizzas so I can pick them up when the laundry is done."

Sheldon watched her leave happily. He did enjoy spending time with Penny. He was about to look away when he caught a glimpse of something unexpected. For a second he could have sworn he saw an opaque shape following her out of the laundry room. His heart skipped a beat and he had a flash of remorse. A moment later he shook his head. What foolishness. There was no such thing as a ghost.


End file.
